My life as a sitcom

My life as a sitcom………

A glimpse into the everyday life of a girl, away from her country, people and culture into this wonderland where everyday is one comedy of errors and everyday is a lesson to the next day! And every day is an episode one like that is watched in my country. Incidentally India is one huge market for sitcoms. Everyone there are so addicted to watching and following them that its one of the favorite conversational topics. When growing up I remember watching a mega serial that was aired for almost 3 years, where the lead character was pregnant for about 15 months.
Therefore coming from the land of sitcoms, let me present you my life to you all in a very Indian-ish sitcom style where the whole serial revolves around family, relatives, struggles, triumphs, comics and loads and loads of tear jerker!!


The day starts with cell ringing absurdly in the early hours….at 5 am in the morning. Though I know that the cell rings as an alarm like that of somebody hammering your house down, every dawn is like waking up from the a nightmare where it takes a minute or two to get your bearings…(The camera zooms on the girl, in a disarray…..still sleepy and mumbling nonsense …..) . It is one of the major pitfalls marrying a software Techy guy. Hubby dear wakes up instantly when his cell rings. Wake him normally like normal people, you would find him dead to the world.

Then the race begins …to catch the bus at 7:38!!! Though one gets up at 5 its not until 6 Am they become active. Cook, iron, pack, take bath, dress all that happens in the whirling motion, hubby dear is snoring through all the ruckus!!

Run from the house to the bus stop which about half a mile. Bus comes just before you cross the road. The driver, a thatha(in our language means, grandfather. Mostly referring to his age!!) always has a winning smile when I board the bus….” You are late”…My morning frenzy is always to best him but as always I end up listening to his teasing rebuke that I am late!!

Then to the spice of this sitcom which is my life…”WORK”!! A world unto itself!! Flagged by two different personalities on either side of her cubicle, the leading lady begins her work only to be interrupted by her colleagues chipping in to ask about her weekend…its almost 9 before she really gets to her work. Just then the phone rings….its her dear hubby calling in to know where the sugar is kept at home as he has just got up and needs his coffee urgently….And from the left side a voice is heard, “Hey did u see the program on TV yesterday of how they were taming the bull, and later on killing it how they distributed the flesh for eating”…That was Mike…always egging to me talk passionately about vegetarianism. Which I almost every time end up doing. Finishing up with the interruptions, our star thinks she must have coffee too before she proceeds, and then pauses at some of her friends place to chat up till she finishes up her coffee..
The outlook calendar pops up a meeting reminder exactly at 10. The meeting is about some bored product demonstration. Finally I sit up at my place at about 11:30. Time for lunch!! The tummy is growling. Pacifying it seems to be the choice of the hour. Get to lunch with lot of friends…chat up, exchange recipes and knowledge of this weekend’s best buy from the shopping!! Give advise to the troubled friend whose marriage is in rocks and also try setting up an unmarried one with husbands many bachelor friends.

Now really to work . This is at 1 PM. Well, the right one was very silent whole of morning, so he pitches in to ask whether I have heard of the word “prima donna”. When I attempted to tell him what I understand from the word, he lectures me almost 25 minutes what it means through so many examples throwing in a bunch of new words to which he very kindly volunteered to tell me their meaning. Through all this I was subtly trying to get out off…but what the heck, he was in my cube I cant ask him to get out…
But our heroine is a clever lady…she messages her friend to call her to save her from his situation. Promptly she calls her, and even before the end of the first ring, our lady pounces on the phone …but No, that guy is not in the mood to leave before delivering all what he set out to tell. So I keep on the phone, hoping that he takes the hint and leaves her alone…this went on for 4 minutes, he is still there looking avidly at her bric and brac collection on her table. Ultimately she had to tell him “John, guess this is going to take a while, Can I take a rain check on whatever it is you were telling me earlier”…This finds him making his way to his cube. With a sigh of relief She gets back to her work….She would have been at it for maybe an hour when a frantic call accosts her. This from her dear hubby… ” Darling we have forgotten to pay the rent for this month…” Today is the last day to pay..if we don’t then we will have to shell out an additional $100. Can you be a dear and pay it before 6PM today. I cant get away from work until 9 tonight!!”
That said, got to wind up before 5 to make it to the apartment office before 6. The whole of the afternoon, whatever is left of it goes uninterrupted..thanx to our lady’s scheming devices to extricate herself from unwanted interruptions!!

The Bus arrives sharp at 4:59, an hour journey back home. Just when she shuts down the system, the boss walks into her cube asking her about the status of some of the pending work, and to discuss the upcoming release scheduled next month. The time is ticking, it now shows 4:30. Mentally calculating how much time does it take to travel through the elevator, and to the bus stops. Trying not to hurry up the talk our lady deftly ends the conversation not before the time shows 4:50. 9 minutes. She flings her coats stuffs her bag and runs to the elevator. It takes for ever to come to her 15th floor. As luck would have it stops at every floor, though in actual it stopped only at 4 different floors till it reached the ground floor. 2 more minutes. RUN…….RUN….Just in time to board the bus. Sighing she takes a moment to take a breather when she realizes that something is wrong about this bus…promptly verifies with the driver. She has got on to the wrong bus. Gets down the next stop, walks all the way to her bus stop which is almost a mile, just in time to take the next bus at 5:23. Prays all the way back home that the apartment office is open, manages to run to the office at exactly 6:03 pm. The manager there very sweetly tells her that they are done for the day, she has to come the next day to pay her dues. She pleads and cajoles them to take her check. That done she trudges back home. Sipping hot coffee she goes through her mails, most of them coupons from various grocery shops and clothing outlets! The call comes from hubby dear asking “ Are’nt you ready for Mr. Das house warming party today?” Just keep my beige suit ready…will come and pick you up by 7:30.” One hour to get ready…….I had forgotten about this one. Not ready with the present also. Remember the present I got from one of my friend for my Birthday…a dinner set. Exactly the one to give this occasion. Unwrap it from its older wrapping, re pack it and get his suit ready and dress up in the traditional Sari and all the jewellery. Leave for the party by 8PM. The first person to meet there is the friend who presented me the dinner set. (Am I happy that I took time to change the wrapping!!)
And the first question she asks me what did you bring as a gift? !!!
The usual gossips, jokes and cribs greets us. My tummy is growling yet again embarrassing me to the core. I head straight to the buffet, flood my plate and hog to appease the tempest of my hunger. Just when I was licking the tasty curry from my finger, my husband introduces me to a very prominent person ..” This is my wife Gayatri…” Caught in the act of licking my fingers, I excused myself in a very dignified manner and made a hasty retreat to the restroom. Made myself scarce till it was time to go home. On the way home, hubby was pleased with the outcome of the party and told me how beautiful I look….” A slow melody playing in the car, it’s a full moon night…the car gently glides home, my hubby murmuring sweet nothings …It was a very romantic ride with lots of promises for the night.
It was late when we got back home and with the same light mood, hubby promises to join me soon after he finishes a production support call…Like every night I too promise to wait up for him.

Suddenly I wake up to the ghastly alarm….its 5Am the next day…….!!! Start of another day ….another story….